Some really awesome things, some not so nice things, and some just little things.
No matter what it is, I always end up keeping it to myself; all bottled up in my head. Some may say, "Why do you do that?" but I guess I feel like some thing are better left unheard.
Don't get me wrong, there are days I just want to get in their face and say it. but...I don't. It's frustrating and aggravating! You would think I'd be good at telling people how it is or how I really feel but I DON'T. I can see it happening in my head and then I say to my self "No, don't do that. You will just look stupid or cause more drama."
Another reason of why I don't is because, I can't hold a grudge for more than an hour (prob. even less). Yeah. Great. wonderful-woohoo. yeah, no. You may think it is fine and dandy that I am able to do that but, there comes a point where I feel like screaming "NO MORE!" I don't like people running over me like an old carpet that says "welcome".
I always say, "No, you are not doing this again. You are going to stand up for yourself and tell them you can't be their friend!" Like that changes anything. *rolls eyes* I may be all high and mighty then but you wait a good 30 min and I'll say, "It's all good-no biggy." As you can see, I get very annoyed with myself sometimes.
I mean, sometimes I think it's good that I can-I live a more peaceful life but that doesn't mean it doesn't go away-it's all still there inside of me. I do think some things really don't need to be said and some things you do need to keep to yourself because it really shouldn't be that big of a deal. I suppose this is what this blog is for- my feelings and thoughts but I guess what I am trying to say is that I am trying to figure out (and learn) that either things need to be said or if-
they are better left unsaid...
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